Whole

I am lost for words. I don’t know what to say…

Say “I am strong”

Say “I am rich”

“You are calling me to greater things”

Your heart says “I am lost, I am lost for words”

“You have not forsaken me”

“You never leave me”

Here is what to say.

Speak this out…

I am strong.

I am rich.

I am chosen.

I am appointed.

I have purpose.

I am loved.

I have value.

I am valiant.

I am a mighty man of valour.

I am a fearless warrior.

I am my beloved’s and my beloved is mine, and your banner over me is love.

Crowned with love.

Chosen from birth.

Chosen to give birth.

From the nothing, from the place of miscarriage, comes forth the multiple, the multiplier, the multiplied multiplies.

Let me say that again…

From the nothing, from the place of great loss, from abject failure, from such loss that you could not breathe, the pain, so great you could barely hold on, a without words, all you could do was hold on to the one you love.

The pain so great it sears my soul, all that we had hoped for, gone… I had locked up my tears and thrown away the key… Now they burst forth again from the depths, I cannot hold them in.

“How deep, how wide, how high is your love it, I can never see it”

“Where can I go from your presence, your love surrounds me on every side”

How could I contain it all, how could I be there for her, when I could not be there for myself. The injustice of it all, the theft of that which is most precious, the overflow, the overflowing pain, beyond all capacity to bear. I feel it like it was yesterday, it floods all my senses, beyond all reason, and comfort.

“You are kind, your love is a fury all it’s own, sweeping the dust and turning feet towards, carrying the orphans and resetting broken bones”

“You are kind…”

I cannot contain myself, when that which you have conceived rests stillborn in my arms. The promise lying there, still. Lying there still. Without power, yet with so much impact.

“Your love has ravished my heart, and taken me over, and all I want to be is with you forever.”

“So take me a little closer”

“I want to know your heart”

You were never meant to be alone.

Never the one, only the two.

Where the one is taken, the two shall come.

You expected the one, yet you shall receive the two.

“Your love is so much stronger than anything I have ever tasted”

“You make all things new…”

I am making this new.

I am making this new.

This is a new thing I am making.

Forget the former things, behold I am doing a new thing.

Right now it springs forth.

Right now.

“You turn the bitter into sweet”

“You turn the winter into spring”

For behold the winter is past.

The winter is past.

That which is new springs forth.

From the place of no growth.

From the place of lack and loss, shall come, SHALL COME, overflow and much gain.

You feel the loss, amplified, magnified, intensely, so intensely….

“You make all things new”

When you are at a loss, that is when, that is WHEN, my love pours out, is poured out.

There you sit looking at the empty cup, the place of containment, the place of loss, the place that once contained.

Yet what is it you see?

The last drop falling from the jar into the cup. In slow motion I can see it fall. I sit there questioning how such a small drop can make any difference. Then it falls with such force and impact that it splashes over the edge.

Let me ask you a question?

What does the last drop signify?

The coming of the rain…

You have spoken well.

For this is the end of containment.

Let me say that again…

FOR THIS IS THE END OF CONTAINMENT!

For that which once fell from the bottle, now falls in abundance from the heavens above.

For I have broken that which contains.

You see it now don’t you?

Shattered, broken pieces all around.

Yes I have broken brokenness.

For that which contained you is no more.

Shattered, yes shattered at your feet.

I have broken through.

I am through with brokenness…

For you shall be broken no more.

Yes right now, I have broken, brokenness over you.

So what is it that now remains Lord?

Wholeness.

Just leave the whole thing to me.

For it is so much greater than you think.

It is so much more than you can imagine.

“Oh what a Saviour, isn’t He wonderful”

“For is is Lord of all”

I have decided to give you back so much more than you ever thought you had lost.

Close your eyes and lift up your hands.

Isaiah 49:19-26 For your waste and desolate places and your land once the scene of destruction surely now in coming years will be too narrow to accommodate the population, and those who once swallowed you up will be far away. The children of your bereavement born during your captivity shall yet say in your ears, The place is too narrow for me; make room for me, that I may live. Then Zion, you will say in your heart, Who has borne me all these children, seeing that I lost my offspring and am alone and barren and unfruitful, an exile put away and wandering hither and thither? And who brought them up? Behold, I was left alone put away by the Lord, my Husband; from where then did all these children come? Thus says the Lord God: Behold, I will lift up My hand to the Gentile nations and set up My standard and raise high My signal banner to the peoples; and they will bring your sons in the bosom of their garments, and your daughters will be carried upon their shoulders. And kings shall be your foster fathers and guardians, and their queens your nursing mothers. They shall bow down to you with their faces to the earth and lick up the dust of your feet; and you shall know with an acquaintance and understanding based on and grounded in personal experience that I am the Lord; for they shall not be put to shame who wait for, look for, hope for, and expect Me. Shall the prey be taken from the mighty, or the lawful captives of the just be delivered? For thus says the Lord: Even the captives of the mighty will be taken away, and the prey of the terrible will be delivered; for I will contend with him who contends with you, and I will give safety to your children and ease them. And I will make those who oppress you consume themselves in mutually destructive wars, thus eating their own flesh; and they will be drunk with their own blood, as with sweet wine; and all flesh will know with a knowledge grounded in personal experience that I, the Lord, am your Savior and your Redeemer, the Mighty One of Jacob.