Struggle

For you struggle to be free, to break the chains of confinement.

Yet you are free.

Yet I feel the strain, the pressure, the tension between the now and the not yet. I wrestle with my worthiness, my capacity, my strength and the size of what is your plan, your purpose, your desire. I wrestle with my desire, I contend with my desire, I contend with contentment!

Did I not say “stay on the battlefield so that I would have the victory?” Now you find yourself in the place of victory. Victory on the right and on the left. Not an enemy in sight.

2 Chronicles 20:20 And they rose early in the morning and went out into the Wilderness of Tekoa; and as they went out, Jehoshaphat stood and said, Hear me, O Judah, and you inhabitants of Jerusalem! Believe in the Lord your God and you shall be established; believe and remain steadfast to His prophets and you shall prosper.

So why so surprised that there is plunder?

2 Chronicles 20:24-27 And when Judah came to the watchtower of the wilderness, they looked at the multitude, and behold, they were dead bodies fallen to the earth, and none had escaped! When Jehoshaphat and his people came to take the spoil, they found among them much cattle, goods, garments, and precious things which they took for themselves, more than they could carry away, so much they were three days in gathering the spoil. On the fourth day they assembled in the Valley of Beracah. There they blessed the Lord. So the name of the place is still called the Valley of Beracah blessing. Then they returned, every man of Judah and Jerusalem, Jehoshaphat leading them, to Jerusalem with joy, for the Lord had made them to rejoice over their enemies.

You stand there, you arrive here, expecting to fight, anticipating an ambush. Yet what is it you find?

The plunder from the defeated.

Yet you struggle to possess what I have given you.

You contend with me, you pause and wonder what happens next. You have that surprised look on your face. The “who me?” look.

Well if it is my permission you are asking for, have I not already given it to you?

For I have anointed you as King, I have appointed you for this purpose.

I love how you ask me for permission, yet you need not.

Will I not support the decisions of the one in whom I have chosen?